Business Casual Attire and Professionalism

Dear Debbie,

What are your thoughts about business casual attire? My company is switching over and I'm unsure whether to change the way I dress and whether it will make me seem less professional.

This is a great question, especially for women. I have had this conversation with other women often in the last several years as more businesses relax their dress codes. I, along with probably every other professional woman out there, have struggled with what to wear to work. Everyone runs the risk of seeming less professional if their attire choices are wrong, but the stakes do seem to be higher for women.

Let’s look at the differences at play for men and women when it comes to business casual attire. Clothing decisions can be simple for men because they do not have a wide array of clothing choices. Yes, they have different slacks and shirts but their main decision basically boils down to, “Which pants and what color golf shirt should I wear today?” For men, typically a pair of khakis and a golf shirt or open collar shirt is what constitutes acceptable business casual dress.

Women, on the other hand, have so many options that the definition of business casual can become muddled. Does business casual mean skirts or pants? Short sleeves, long sleeves, or sleeveless? Close toed shoes, open toed shoes, or sandals? How low cut should my blouses be? How much jewelry, if any, can I wear?

First, check your company policy closely and always abide by it, even if others don’t. Within those parameters, I advise women across the board in all industries and professions to play it safe with dress decisions. When in doubt, go with the safer choice. If something has even a remote chance of making you or others feel uncomfortable, don’t wear it to work.

While I like the idea of casual dress, when you are representing your company in front of clients or the public, you should be in traditional business attire. In addition to showing respect to your clients and to your company -- you just never know who you might be introduced to or run into as you are out and about!

Leadership Traits

Dear Debbie,

In your opinion, what are the most important traits for a leader to have? Are these qualities the same for men and for women?

The most important traits for a leader to possess – and exhibit – are integrity, courage, a high level of emotional intelligence, and great communication skills. Of course, there are many other characteristics of a good leader, but these are the main ones that come to mind.

The first two traits on the list, integrity and courage, should be givens in the business world but unfortunately they do not apply to everyone who rises to a leadership position. Part of integrity and courage is having the ability to be honest with yourself and others at all times and in all situations. It takes integrity and courage to always do what you think is right, especially in the absence of parameters or guidelines, which you will likely experience with time in any leadership position. And, it particularly takes integrity and courage to do the right thing when people are trying to persuade you otherwise.

Many times, doing the right thing without a precedent also takes a tremendous amount of emotional intelligence and mental toughness which not everyone possesses. A high level of emotional intelligence enables you to behave decisively and calmly, even under the most difficult circumstances. Leaders simply must be able to separate feelings from facts.

To be effective, these qualities must be combined with the ability to communicate clearly to and with all types of people, regardless of their backgrounds, positions, and goals. Poor communication ability has stalled many careers. If you aren’t a strong communicator, chances are that you will not be a strong leader.

I think you’ll find that these traits apply to all great leaders, regardless of gender.

Want to Succeed Wildly?

I have not shared an article on my blog until today when I read 'Want to Succeed Wildly, Adjust Your Attitude' by Vanessa Van Petten. I wanted to share it here because it describes one of the ways in which we as individuals get in our own way of success and achievement. It is something we can all change about ourselves. Vanessa Van Petten specializes in social and emotional intelligence research and development. The focus of her company is on research of youth behavior and helping adults keep up with young adults. Want to Succeed Wildly, Adjust Your Attitude Have you ever wondered what makes someone a world-renowned musician or a critically acclaimed novelist? Malcolm Gladwell would say it all comes down to practice—over 10,000 hours of practice, to be exact. But a study by Gary McPherson, discussed in David Brooks’ book The Social Animal, highlights that there is also an important attitude needed for success. In 1997, Gary McPherson decided to study musicians—namely what exactly contributed to a musician’s success. Was it practice? Genetics? Environment? He studied 157 randomly selected kids as they picked and learned a musical instrument. Some went on to be professional musicians, and others quit playing after they left school. He was looking for patterns. Were there traits or characteristics that all of the successful musicians had? Amazingly, the commonality was not one of the obvious ones. It was not IQ, aural sensitivity, math skills, natural rhythm, or even their parents that dictated success. There was only one question that provided a clue to indicate which students would be successful and which wouldn’t. Before they even selected their instrument, McPherson asked the budding musicians one question: "How long do you think you will play the instrument you choose?" The answer to this question predicted whether or not a student would be successful. If they thought they would play an instrument their whole life, they did better; if they thought they would only play temporarily, they did not play as well. Their success had nothing to do with skills—it was all about their attitude. Logically, this makes sense. If you think you are going to do something for life, you work harder at and you are therefore better. However, we often do not apply this knowledge to our choices and work. For example, how often do you hear someone say, "I couldn’t be a doctor, I am terrible at science," or "I can’t do that project, I’m not good at organization." We do not need any inherent skills to be able to be good at what we do, we only need an attitude that we are going to stick with it. Our minds and skills sets will grow with us as we stick to our goals. How can we use McPherson's study in our own lives and businesses? 1.Set your mind up for success. When facing a business project or when applying to a job opening, throw away unhelpful mindsets like "I wouldn’t be good at it," or "I could never." 2.Forget how and focus on when. When picturing your work or projects, start by adjusting your perception of how long you will stick with it instead of focusing on whether or not you have the right skills. 3.Dependent on others? Don’t forget to tell time. When working with team members on a business project, you can gauge how successful they will be by asking them about their timeline. This is especially good if you are interviewing employees. If you want to know how someone will be at a potential job, ask them how long they expect to do it—this will be a better predictor of their performance than anything else. Knowing how our attitude affects our performance is an essential aspect of furthering our understanding of ourselves, and the probability of our success. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Vanessa Van Petten specializes in social and emotional intelligence research and development. The focus of her company is on research of youth behavior and helping adults keep up with young adults. The Young Entrepreneur Council is an invite-only nonprofit organization comprised of the world's most promising young entrepreneurs. The YEC recently published #FixYoungAmerica: How to Rebuild Our Economy and Put Young Americans Back to Work (for Good), a book of more than 30 proven solutions to help end youth unemployment.

Executive Leadership Coaching

Dear Debbie,
What is an executive coach? How do I know if one would be beneficial for me and my career?
Executive coaching is a formal engagement in which a qualified coach works with an organizational leader in a series of dynamic, confidential sessions designed to establish and achieve clear goals that will result in improved managerial performance. The relationship between a manager and a coach is different from other types of professional relationships. For example, a coaching relationship focuses on enhancing performance while a mentoring relationship usually has broader objectives. An executive coach is much more involved in execution and outcome assessment than the typical consultant might be. A coach is not an authority figure, but is someone who is engaged with their client on all levels to provide assessment, challenge, and support.
Above all, a coach is someone who is there for the professional client for collaboration and to offer the type of counsel and support that the executive may not otherwise receive. A great coach will work with clients to assess individual circumstances, strengths, weaknesses, and developmental opportunities.
In some circles, having a coach is something to brag about. In other situations, a coach may be brought in as a reaction to a certain set of circumstances that indicate a performance deficit. In today’s business climate, coaches are seeing an increased demand across the board at the ‘c suite’ level. An executive coach is a perk to which some top executives feel entitled and that some leaders negotiate as part of their total compensation and benefits package. Some companies provide coaching initiatives for new, transferring and high-potential employees, while other individuals seek out coaches and pay for them on their own. In my practice, I see a variety of circumstances that prompt individuals and organizations to engage me in the role of advisor and coach.
If you are considering an executive coach, keep in mind that your perception of coaching greatly affects your readiness to benefit from having a coach. If you have a positive perception of coaching and think that it could help you, you’ve taken the first step toward realizing its benefits. You should assess your own readiness for what will be a serious commitment and an occasionally uncomfortable experience. There are coaching readiness questionnaires that I use with my clients to help them fully understand and assess where they are before the coaching process starts.
When you work with a coach, you can expect to change your skills and your behaviors and develop better leadership abilities. Resistance to any kind of personal change is normal, realistic, and to be expected. It’s not a light decision to engage an executive coach. Only you can accurately assess your thoughts, feelings, and needs. A great coach will use some very sophisticated behavioral and competency based assessment instruments that will enable you to clearly understand where you are starting and what you will need to work on.
Executive coaches have become much more common than they were even five years ago. If you decide that you’re ready to benefit from coaching, take time to find a well-qualified coach with whom you can relate on a personal level. Selecting the right coach has a dramatic impact on successful results. Engaging a well-qualified coach that is a good fit for you will positively affect your individual growth and your future career path. Good luck!

Interviewing Tips

With the current job market, openings are few and far between and I want to make the most of any interviews that I get. Do you have any interviewing tips to pass along? What do you look for when you interview job candidates?

I have a lot of interviewing tips, but first let me give you a few things to think about. Before you start thinking about the actual interview, I would challenge you to define those things that make you different from all of the other people who might be vying for the position. What makes you special? What makes you particularly well suited for the job? Put yourself in the hiring manager’s seat and ask what would really “wow” you if you were comparing job applicants.

Think about those traits and skills that are at the top of your “strengths” list and determine which of these set you apart, and which apply to the job. Keep it simple. I suggest defining three or four things that really make you stand out from the crowd, and practice describing those traits aloud. That way, when you are asked in an interview why you are right for the job you will have already thought out the answers and will be ready to sell yourself smoothly.

When I’m interviewing, I look for that proverbial first impression to see how the person comes across. Is he or she friendly, comfortable, well mannered, and well groomed? Is he or she confident, poised, and ready to contribute to the team? During the interview, I’m asking myself how this person will fit into and be received by our team. I’ll bet the hiring managers you meet will be thinking about this, too.

So, I will leave you with this suggestion. Enter the room like you own it but are willing to give it up. Project a comfortable, confident, and engaging demeanor. Most important, articulate your strengths and skills and how you can contribute value to the team. Good luck!

Taking Charge of My Professional Development

Other than an annual performance review that is administered by my immediate manager I do not get much, if any, feedback on how I am doing. I really want to develop skills that will serve me well in competing for future promotions. How should I go about putting in place a structured developmental plan that will provide me with regular beneficial feedback?

There are specific steps that I will recommend for you to take in order to get regular feedback, however this may be more challenging than it seems. The reason I say this is that you should first look at your organizational culture and determine whether it is a feedback rich environment. If it is not and this is more of an mandated exercise than a true developmental tool, then you have your work cut out for you in seeking additional feedback.

We know that organizations in which there is regular and ongoing feedback generate more creativity and innovation. However, when there is limited or little feedback, such as in your case, it is difficult to foster more unless the culture supports it.

Regardless, I would still attempt to set up regular meetings with your immediate manager as well as establish mentors outside of your chain of command who can give you ongoing and regular feedback to further your development. Presenting your request in a positive light as a way to improve your performance as well as to help the company will hopefully help you get some action.

Women Helping Other Women

I work in a predominantly female workgroup and find that the women who are in management are not very open to helping develop and promote other women. Is this an isolated situation or do you see this in other organizations?

Unfortunately, the research and studies have shown that women are not as apt to help other women as men have historically done in the workplace. In a recent informal study conducted by CNN on bullying in the workplace, it was found that most of the bullying is done by women and most is directed toward other women. Honestly, this is a workplace phenomenons that saddens me greatly. I so long for women to be mentors to one another and to encourage each other in corporate life.

Some people contribute this negative behavior to something called the Queen Bee syndrome, which implies that when a woman has clawed and scraped her way to a senior position, she isn’t as anxious to help others because perhaps nobody helped her. This is an unfortunate response, for many reasons. First, it’s a negative outlook to have. Second, helping deserving professionals of either gender to reach their potential is one of the most rewarding and satisfying facets of being a leader. Helping others to develop and grow is one of the most positive work experiences that a leader can have.

All I can say about women who aren’t open to helping other women is this. We can’t control what others do, but we can control ourselves. The best way to break this cycle is to approach your own career differently. Lend a hand to women coming up along with you or behind you, and to men as well. Be known as a woman who is secure enough in her own abilities and career to help others develop their own talents. You’ll have a richer professional life as a result, and you won’t be sorry. I promise.

Data Resources

There are tons of articles about our work world today with lots of statistics sited. Where do you go for the most trusted and reliable research based data about the workplace today?

There are many fabulous resources that produce valid and valuable research data the many elements of today’s workplace. I find that non-profit organizations are some of the best resources, and I use several of them. Two which are at the top of my list are Catalyst and The Center for Creative Leadership. Catalyst was founded in 1962, and is the leading nonprofit membership organization expanding opportunities for women and business. The Center for Creative Leadership exclusively focuses on leadership education and research, and provides unparalleled expertise in solving the leadership challenges of individuals and organizations around the world. I find that these two organizations produce excellent research based on in-depth studies that span the globe.

In my opinion, these are the best to start with for tracking almost any specific data relative to today’s workplace.

Gender Bias in the Workplace - Still!

There is so much published about how women outnumber men in the workforce now but still can’t make it to the top of the corporate ladder. What are your thoughts on this and what do you see as being the real issues behind the statistics?

There are many different viewpoints on this topic these days, but the news is getting better. Albeit slowly, but things are improveing with more women rising to the top ranks within corporations. While women still hold only a handful of the CEO positions within Fortune 500 companies, they are continuing to make headway in attaining more senior level jobs.

I think there are a number of things at play here, so I’ll start by describing the make-up of the power base within organizations and who the decision makers are when it comes to promoting women. The majority of senior level positions are still held by middle-aged, and older, white males, many of whom are much more comfortable promoting like-males over females. This is the unspoken reality in many organizations.

The counter piece to this reality is the fact that women do not help other women and promote them as men do for each other,. Sometimes females will make it to the top but are slow to encourage, mentor, and promote other females. Men in general are more inclusive, comfortable, and natural working with other men and tend to ‘default’ to what their comfort zone can handle, especially when it comes to powerful positions. This has been proven by studies, time and again, and we know it is still at the root of why we still have comparatively small numbers of females in top-level jobs.

There is also another combination of contributing factors, one being that more women choose to get off of the fast track and not play politics once they hit the mid- to upper-level management positions. Again, studies have shown that more women decide to change career paths and take time off than men, and they do so for a number of reasons. Research has also shown that women still bear the burden of the family decisions and responsibilities, such as who will pick up the children, or when will the household chores get done. Even women who have additional help still bear the responsibility for family and household management.

So, while the number of women rising to the top ranks is steadily and slowly improving, there is a confluence of factors that work together which continue to limit the number women in high-level positions. A great article that delves more into this topic and expounds on my answer is at: http://www.catalyst.org/file/523/the_myth_of_the_ideal_worker_does_doing_all_the_right_things_really_get_women_ahead.pdf

Management Responsibilities

As a fairly new manager, when I have employees come to me and tell me they would like to talk to me as their manager but in the strictest of confidence, I many times feel uncomfortable. How do I handle these types of employee conversations when it could damage their trust in me as their manager?

When an employee starts out a conversation by telling you that they want to talk in strict confidence, before they go any further remind them that if they tell you something that requires you to take action, then you will do what you must do as a manager and leader. Many times, what an employee tells you will be about themselves or something they may be going through and you don’t have to do anything but listen and understand. Other times, they may divulge something that you are required by law or by ethics to report to your boss or perhaps even the authorities. It could even be something about another employee that you will need to further investigate.

It can sometimes be a challenge when faced with this type of discussion, but be prepared to make it clear up front that you will take the necessary action if your good judgement calls for it. As a leader, it is important to know that you have a greater responsibility to act upon certain situations than you do outside of your leadership role. This is what you make clear to anyone that begins a discussion requesting confidence.

Once your employees know that you will do what is right, even in the face of challenge and adversity, chances are good that they will trust you completely and not feel that they must precede their statements with a confidentiality statement.

Diversity in Our Ever-Changing World

There is so much written and discussed about the topic of diversity but then I also hear of women’s initiatives and other affinity groups. Don’t all of these groups fall under the diversity umbrella? I would appreciate an overview of diversity and what it means in today’s workplace.

The short answer to the first part of your question is yes, all of the various groups you refer to are a part of a diverse workplace and are representative of a particular group that contributes to that diversity.
Let me give you the overview of diversity that you asked about which I think will help you better understand when and how the term is used.

We can break diversity down into two categories, or types, that are present in today’s workplace - vertical diversity and horizontal diversity. Vertical diversity refers to the wide range of ages in the workplace, with four generations working alongside each other, and horizontal diversity refers to all other types of different groups to include those of various races, cultures, genders, sexual orientations, and religious beliefs.

The important thing to know and understand about diversity is that it enriches our lives, both professionally and personally. It brings such different backgrounds and perspectives together, and it creates synergies that otherwise aren’t generated. This results in greater ideas and increased creativity to all settings and in all situations.

Many studies have proved that when diversity is embraced and celebrated, organizations are higher performing, more profitable entities as a result. Diversity contributes just what it implies, a diverse range of perspectives and ideas, that ultimately better serve the world.

Avoiding a Hostile Workplace

As a manager, I have had repeated complaints from employees about a fellow employee telling offensive jokes. Sometimes they are just overhearing them but are nonetheless still offended. How do I approach this employee when many of the complaints are based on hearsay?

This is another great question and one that is so very important for you to understand how to handle as a manager/leader. This one can get you into lots of trouble and can create additional problems if you do not handle it correctly.

The first rule-of-thumb as a leader and a manager who is responsible for people is that once you have knowledge of an issue, you basically own that issue and must take the appropriate action to correct things. In this case, when an employee is offended by something that another employee is saying, your workplace can potentially be deemed a hostile work environment. This is one in which all employees do not feel comfortable and may even feel threatened. Now that you have knowledge of this, it is your responsibility as the leader to remedy this situation swiftly and decisively.

When you receive a hearsay complaint such as this, you will need to investigate. Start by asking the complainant for their side of the situation, asking them if they did, in fact, tell what could be offensive or inappropriate jokes in the office. Make it clear that this behavior is inappropriate for the workplace and that they should immediately stop the practice of telling such jokes. Usually, this is all it takes to stop the offensive language; however, I would suggest you take it a step further. Take this opportunity to look at what training, if any, your employees have had in this area. I’m willing to bet that your company/organization has an acceptable conduct policy and if so, has everyone signed off on that policy? If not, make sure they understand what is acceptable and what is not, and have them sign statements that they have read and understand the conduct policy.

If there is a dispute over what the two individuals, the complainer and the complainant, are telling you and/or you have already done all of the above, then you should seek out other employees for written statements. Once you determine that the employee has indicated an understanding of the acceptable conduct policy and has chosen to violate it, then you must take immediate action to discipline and perhaps even remove the employee from the workplace, depending on the level of the complaint.

Delegating Effectively

Delegating
I have just been promoted and am working on delegating more to my team. How do I give up the need to control every assignment and trust the job will get done?

Understanding and learning how to effectively delegate is a critical leadership trait that all new managers must hone -- and as quickly as possible!. Notice that I use the word ‘effectively’ because like every other skill, you must learn how to effectively use this one for your maximum advantage. Delegating is extremely important to your success for two main reasons: your own time management, and the development of those for whom you are responsible. For many people, learning to delegate and to let go is a challenge.

Start out with smaller, maybe less important tasks that you feel more comfortable delegating, and that won’t stress you out if they aren’t completed exactly to your satisfaction or on time. When you first begin to delegate, you will likely fight the urge to micro-manage the details and this is where you have to really work on yourself. Set reporting timelines for your subordinates to submit progress updates on specific tasks. Hold regular conference calls with your team so you can gauge the overall progress when you have many things going on at once, which you will as you move up in your responsibilities. As with any new skill you are learning and developing ,there is initial discomfort when you practice it. This is because you are stretching yourself and going out of your normal comfort zone. Discomfort is okay and is to be expected.

Remember back to when you were in an individual contributor role and how you felt when you were given an assignment, especially one that was new to you. You may have been slightly apprehensive but you were most likely proud and rewarded that your boss had the faith and confidence in your abilities to give you such an assignment. This boosted your self-confidence and ability to take on even more responsibilities. This will be what you are doing when you dole out those delegated assignments, not to mention the fact that you are getting the work done through many channels which is great for your overall team development.

Last, and just as important, I suggest you look around at your team and ensure you have the right people in the right job assignments. If you don’t, then make the necessary changes to get the right people in place. This is a mistake that many managers make when they let too much time go by before making what can be tough decisions. Once you do this you should be confident in the fact that your individual team members are more than capable and ready to take on each and every assignment, growing in the process.

Now . . . go delegate one task! Good luck!

Giving Constructive Feedback

Dear Debbie,

I am a relatively new manager and have little experience in giving feedback, especially when it involves difficult issues or performance deficiencies. How do you prepare for and deliver constructive feedback without hurting the relationship?

When you prepare for such a discussion, start by clearly defining the issue. Separate your emotions from the facts that you need to review and discuss. Emotions such as fear, anger, stress, and anxiety are a few that can be attached to difficult situations. While these emotions may be understandable and even justified, they won’t help you in solving the issues at hand.
Next, detail any and all performance deficiency specifics that are related to the issue. Look at this challenge in an objective, professional manner, focusing on the facts alone. Anticipate what the employee’s reaction may be and prepare your responses accordingly to keep the meeting on topic and on track. Have a written outline in front of you with the points you need to make and the goals for the meeting.
By preparing with meeting objectives and a clear agenda, you will be able to better control the discussion and accomplish what you had planned. Even though you may be dealing with negative behavior, it’s important to keep your tone and demeanor as positive as possible. Let the employee know that improvement is possible and what he or she must do to achieve it.

Networking

Dear Debbie,

There are so many networking groups in the area that I get a bit overwhelmed, feeling as though I should participate in all for fear of missing out on an opportunity. How do I determine which groups are worth my time?

This really can be a problem in today’s business world when the advice we get is to network, network, and network some more. Let’s face it, if you live in a major metropolitan area, there are multiple groups for every industry, sector, gender, and age from which to choose and participate. Ultimately, there aren’t enough hours in the day to join everything.
Give yourself permission not to accept every invitation to every function that comes your way. Like everything else in your time management tool box, you must be smart with your networking choices. It’s important to ensure a return on the investment of your time, especially in the areas of business and personal development.
So, here are a few things to think about when you decide which invitations to accept for networking opportunities. First, ask yourself what the demographic makeup will be in attendance. Will it be a group that is interested in your business? Will it be individuals that you can connect with for future business and for your own development? Most likely these questions will help you in effectively eliminating those invitations that likely won’t be productive for you.
Second, determine what your main purpose would be for attending a particular function. Is it to meet certain people? Pitch your business? Connect with future employers?
Once you identify the right group or groups for your networking time, look at ways to increase your level of visibility through leadership roles within the organization and speaking opportunities. These offer excellent opportunities for you to elevate your public visibility and name recognition, while increasing your self confidence and furthering your personal and professional development.

Managing a Difficult Employee

Dear Debbie,

I manage a great work group except for one employee who is a chronic complainer and persistently negative. I tried once to counsel him as part of his performance review, and he badmouthed me to the rest of the group. What should my next step be?

This falls into the 80/20, or better yet, the 90/10 rule wherein 10 percent of your employees actually create 90 percent of your problems. This one employee, if left to his own devices, could potentially destroy your team’s morale and undermine your credibility in the process. Such dissent can also hinder your workgroup’s performance. There’s a lot at stake in this situation.
As the manager of the group, the sole responsibility for taking action rests with you. You basically have two choices: rein him in (have the employee change their ways), or move him out (either voluntarily or involuntarily).
With any employee issue, you want to identify whether the problem is performance related or behavior related. Once you determine which it is, your course of action will be much easier to define. In this case, the problem is clearly a behavioral issue which should always be dealt with in a swift and decisive manner. I say this because behavioral issues are conscious decisions on the part of the employee to behave in a certain way which is typically unacceptable to the organizational rules and values. A performance related issue, on the other hand, would be addressed very differently.
Your employee has chosen to be negative and to chronically complain. Even worse, he has chosen to behave in a way that is bordering insubordination by “badmouthing” you as his manager. The result of this behavior is damaging to the workgroup and to the company, which is unacceptable.
You mention that you have counseled him as a part of his performance review. Have you had a standalone discussion with him about only his behavior? Have you presented him with very specific examples of how his behavior is unacceptable and why it is a negative force for the entire group? If you have not yet had this specific discussion, then you should do so immediately. Be sure to document your discussion in detail. When you have this talk with him, you should include specific expectations that define exactly what you will and will not tolerate in his behavior going forward. Additionally, you should outline the next steps that will occur, such as a follow up meeting to gauge his performance and progress, and include the expected changes that you will be reviewing with him at that time. This puts the responsibility squarely on him to really think about and take steps to change his behavior.
I cannot stress enough the need for you to cite very specific examples of his negative behavior and how you would expect him to handle similar situations differently in the future. The hope is that you will be able to turn him around and see a marked improvement in him once you bring it to his attention and let him know the consequences.
Be aware that there will be times when an employee simply refuses to change. Either the person does not believe that there will be consequences or they are resistant to change at all costs. In this case, continue to document any ensuing meetings and your efforts to counsel him. If all else fails and you are seeing no improvement, then it may be time to terminate his employment. Allowing one person to adversely affect your entire workgroup simply isn’t fair to your employees, to you, or to your company.
Good luck – this is one of the particularly challenging parts of being a leader.

Making Successful Business Presentations

Dear Debbie,

Do you have any tips for making business presentations? I've been asked to give my first big one and I'm nervous!

Most people have experienced the anxiety, trepidation and fear that often precede public speaking, especially if it the presentation is to a large or influential group. The good news is that experience definitely helps and you will become more comfortable and self-confident with every presentation that you design and deliver.

It helps to remember that being nervous before speaking or presenting is perfectly natural. Even the most seasoned professional can have the jitters before delivering a large presentation. The key word here is preparation, and the more speaking experience you gain the more you will understand its importance. If anything, you want to over prepare and over practice. Knowing your material inside and out will help ease any anxiety that you feel, and will help you deliver a more polished presentation.

It’s also important to anticipate any controversial points or difficult questions that you may encounter while you are behind the podium, and plan your responses accordingly. The fear of the unknown is at the root of most speaking anxiety, so thinking through potential scenarios can be very helpful.

In addition to being familiar with your material, become familiar with your audience. Find out who will be in the room, what levels in the organization are represented, and why your presentation might impact them. It’s important to know your audience so that you can connect with them through your presentation. By researching your audience in advance, you can incorporate stories, facts, or examples that will resonate with them and connect to the points you wish to make.

I’d also advise you to keep your presentation as concise as possible. No one enjoys sitting through unnecessarily long, drawn out speeches. Think about the main points that you want your audience to remember, and then hit those points as succinctly and directly as possible. Have a handout that includes more detailed information for those who are interested.

Practice your presentation before a trusted colleague or advisor; preferably someone who will understand the material sufficiently to critique both the content and your overall delivery. Then, practice repeatedly in front of the best presentation tool of all – the mirror.

Getting your first business presentation under your belt is an important career milestone. I wish you the best of luck!

Business Casual Attire and Professionalism

Dear Debbie,

What are your thoughts about business casual attire? My company is switching over and I'm unsure whether to change the way I dress and whether it will make me seem less professional.

This is a great question, especially for women. I have had this conversation with other women often in the last several years as more businesses relax their dress codes. I, along with probably every other professional woman out there, have struggled with what to wear to work. Everyone runs the risk of seeming less professional if their attire choices are wrong, but the stakes do seem to be higher for women.

Let’s look at the differences at play for men and women when it comes to business casual attire. Clothing decisions can be simple for men because they do not have a wide array of clothing choices. Yes, they have different slacks and shirts but their main decision basically boils down to, “Which pants and what color golf shirt should I wear today?” For men, typically a pair of khakis and a golf shirt or open collar shirt is what constitutes acceptable business casual dress.

Women, on the other hand, have so many options that the definition of business casual can become muddled. Does business casual mean skirts or pants? Short sleeves, long sleeves, or sleeveless? Close toed shoes, open toed shoes, or sandals? How low cut should my blouses be? How much jewelry, if any, can I wear?

First, check your company policy closely and always abide by it, even if others don’t. Within those parameters, I advise women across the board in all industries and professions to play it safe with dress decisions. When in doubt, go with the safer choice. If something has even a remote chance of making you or others feel uncomfortable, don’t wear it to work.

While I like the idea of casual dress, when you are representing your company in front of clients or the public, you should be in traditional business attire. In addition to showing respect to your clients and to your company -- you just never know who you might be introduced to or run into as you are out and about!

Aging and the Fast Track

Dear Debbie,

My company is hiring all these younger employees, and I'm starting to feel outdated. How can I make sure that I stay on the fast track as I age?

Let me reassure you that you are not alone in feeling this way. For the first time in U.S. history, there are four generations in the workplace, working together as peers as well as managing each other. Much has been written about this mix because it has presented some new and different corporate dynamics. The wide range of ages can mean very different communication styles, workplace practices and diverse approaches to work.

I encourage you to really look at this as an opportunity for both your own professional and personal growth as well as a chance to mentor and advise younger coworkers. I especially encourage you to look at the younger workers as a resource for your own learning and development. Many times, older workers automatically feel superior to and maybe even annoyed by their younger counterparts. Open yourself up to truly interacting with these younger professionals by engaging them in discussions and seeking their perspectives. Far from being a roadblock to your success, they can help you stay current about the latest trends, especially if they are fresh out of college.

Try not to let you self be seen as “the elder” in the group. Instead, get in there and remain engaged at all levels with everyone. Remaining open to learning opportunities and to change is critical as you move through all stages of your career. Don’t let yourself fall into the trap of feeling superior simply because you have more years of experience. Staying curious yourself will make others interested in learning from you. A willingness to grow will help maintain your position as a key contributor.

It’s helpful to view the process of staying on the fast track as cyclical. The more you stay engaged in learning, the more you will have to offer which, in turn, makes you even more relevant and valuable to everyone in the organization. Your experience, combined with your willingness to continue growing, will make you a stellar employee at any age.

One last reminder – attitude is everything! Keep a positive, young-at-heart, inquisitive outlook about the world and your age won’t be a factor to anyone.

Romance In The Workplace

Dear Debbie,

What do you think about office romances?

My short answer is that is it best to keep work relationships professional and to stay away from romance if you possibly can. However, having said that, sometimes things just happen when you work closely with someone in a demanding environment. Many successful personal relationships and even marriages have started as working relationships. Let’s face it, when you spend the majority of your time with the same people and you get to know them well, you inevitably like some more than others. We are, after all, human.

So while I suggest that you try not to complicate your professional life by mixing in a personal relationship, let me give you the dos and don’ts if you just can’t avoid it or if you’re already in an office romance. When you first sense that a relationship is clearly budding into something serious with someone in your immediate workgroup, I suggest that one of you begin immediately to try to transfer out of the group. The first step to take is to separate your working relationship from your personal relationship, especially if one of you is senior to the other.

If you are peers, it is not quite as complicated but it’s still not a good idea to work together. Resentment as well as issues of favoritism and unfair practices can, and usually will, arise when there are personal relationships within the workplace. These issues can have an adverse impact on reputations and can even derail career paths.

People love to talk, and a budding romance in the office is fabulous fodder for the gossip mill. Don’t let yourself be the target of rumors and innuendo that ultimately can negate your hard work and deter your long-term success. If you don’t wish to change your personal relationship, then it’s generally best for one of you to change jobs.